A parent-child relationship is a special one because both parties get to build a unique bond and learn new things together—the child about the world and the parent about raising a small human into a strong, independent person.
As a parent, it’s important to have good communication with your child so you can build a strong relationship and understand one another. Also, because it promotes child development; a child that feels connected to their parents will experience enhanced cognitive, emotional, and social wellbeing. They will also exhibit positive social behaviours and thus perform better socially and academically.
Children begin to form ideas and beliefs about themselves based on how their parents communicate with them. When parents communicate effectively with their children, they’re showing them respect. From this experience, children feel that they are heard and understood by their parents and experience a boost in self esteem. This self esteem helps children cope better with mistakes, resist peer pressure, and create personal relationships.
The key to communicating effectively with your child is being in the moment, spending quality time with them, and creating a caring environment of trust and respect.
Here’s 11 ways to effectively communicate with your child.
- Set aside time for talking and listening to each other. Family meals can be a great time to do this.
- Turn off electronic devices or put them on silent when you and your child are communicating; this shows that you’re completely focused on the interaction or conversation and assures them that they’ve got your undivided attention.
- In a similar vein, to help children feel more comfortable when communicating with you bend so that you are at their eye level. This shows that you are paying attention and proactively listening to what they are saying.
- Engage in conversations about everyday things. If you and your child are used to communicating a lot, it can make it easier to talk when big or tricky issues arise.
- Be open to talking about positive and negative feelings, including joy, anger, frustration, fear, and anxiety. This helps your child develop a ‘feelings vocabulary’. It’s best to wait until you’ve calmed down from strong emotions like anger before you talk to your child.
- Tune in to your child’s body language (gestures, facial expressions, and spatial distance) and try to respond to non-verbal messages. Also listen to their vocal tone, as this may reveal true emotions they are trying to mask.
- Involve your child in conversations; this could be as simple as asking ‘What do you think about that?’. It’s important to engage children in conversations because it helps them express their thoughts, get what they need, and resolve conflicts.
- Build on what your child is telling you and show them that you’re interested in what they’re talking about, by saying things like ‘Tell me more’ and ‘Go on’.
- Avoid jumping in, cutting off, or finishing your child’s sentences—even if they say something odd or are having trouble finding words.
- Control your response. Children can say and do things that provoke an emotional response from you, but it’s important to control your emotions as positive communication relies heavily on this. Counting to ten before responding to a child can be a great way to help diffuse emotions and ensure you don’t say words that you may regret later.
- Repeat or rephrase what your child has said from time to time. This lets your child know you’re actively listening to what they’re saying.
Wanting to strengthen your connection with your children is a wonderful endeavour, and we hope these tips help you with it. We understand that being a parent can be hard work, so we just want to say that you’re doing an amazing job.